This bit sounds a little bit weird they have to drop the trousers shaft and are you ready. For your dear rick let's do it. So dear rick he's brought to us and to you the listener by certainly my best friend and probably your third best friend i'll be honest i don't have best friends like my problem is up i fall out with people too quickly yeah. So i i won't put them in best friend category because that's who i mainly fall out with okay. So i might put them in like sound acquaintance yeah like if we meet up in the pub in a couple of weeks i'll be signing with them. And also for me up in the pub with them in three years it'll just be the exact same level of soundness they're not getting that special treatment but then.
They're never gonna fall off either we'll always just just quick fist pump usual motor caddy like a rod potter like a rod pot it's a nice solid rod potter so mo caddy um sponsored podcast this is the ninth week they wanted to get some really good brand exposure. And a line to the best podcast in the world and they're walking away being told the rob potter of the golf world so hopefully there's a compliment i think they should do rob if you're listening um we'd all be a bit more like rob the world would be a nice place i don't know i'm going with this now anyway right you ready. For this yeah. So dear rick i play golf but once a week with a couple of close friends okay i play off about 10. And my mates play for around 28. we typically play stableford and play for a tenner the loser pays the tenants the winner and second place keeps their money so there's three of them yeah if you win you're going to turn her off the guy that finishes the last nice middle's quite i'd quite like that format because if you like if one's steaming away he's going to win. So it's the second and third place balance out if second and first are close it's kind of a good dynamic in the future um if you win two games in a row then.
Your handicap gets cut by two. And if you lose two games in a row then.
Your handicap goes up by two so it's all in good fun and good spirits to keep it even yes i'm really invested in this we should have a go at this one time that being said one of my mates always cheats oh my god he doesn't always count his ear shots in the car. And also the correct amount of a bunker so let's say it's four at the bunker it suddenly become three etcetera he doesn't take drops from the correct areas when going to hazard. And he moves the ball to a better lie when he shouldn't so essentially he's cheating wow given it's good fun and it's only for small amounts how do i call out my fellow golfers who don't play by the rules. So this is as simple as clear cut. Or someone cheating in the comp i just feel like this is an education piece okay i just i just feel like this is it might take a few times. And you might have to do it quite tactfully. And you might just need to you know address it in the right manner i can feel a role play coming on here i think it's just a very tactical way of doing it just education. So for example let's say on the first hole they have a fresh air shot they take two extra in the bunker and he walks off instead of top five when you actually know they took seven or eight or whatever it may be it's i think it's that point you go just a quick one john um can i just recount that score because there was the the air the shot that you missed. And i don't know if you know but that's actually counted as an actual shot so that'll be two and then.
When you went in the bunker i was watching i was counting i think i don't think you got out first time i think that was maybe one you hit the bank. And it rolled back down and went in your footprint you remember your whinge and mold then.
You tried to take it again and it hit the lip and and just missed you because if it actually hit you that would have also been a penalty believe it or not and then.
You kicked it out and then.
You three put so um if we count out together you count that with me jump so that's one to the to the fairway you missed that once that's two remember that you've got to count that air shot you then.
Put it in the bunker you hit it against the lips at four five six seven out the bunker you're two points let's say oh you actually scored nine so don't worry we'll put nine down um just remember those little things but also a little tip out the bunker next.
Time just open that face up and just get that wedge under the ball ball a bit more christ used to be fun you did it's just that listen i like cheating with the best of them. But when we're freaking playing for money you you play by the rules i think i think that's hopefully it's done in more naivety than on purpose if it's done on purpose then.
Obviously that's a different topic. But i still think you can address it the same way [Music] i would try. And educate as opposed to come out straight fighting with the fists okay that went quite serious. And quite well fair enough any advice from you um it is a tough one because i've had some friends that play golf that weren't necessarily cheating. But if might not do things the right way. So like you know there's the rule now if you've got a bound you can drop it near the out of bounds. But these do that before it was a rule yeah. But that's only if it's a local rule as well well yeah that's not even if that's not um i think as long as in my opinion if it's i i would say there's two ways there's cheating like actual cheating where you know on purpose you're moving your golf ball. Or you put purposely writing the wrong score down or whatever it may be like when we played that bloody charity golf day a few last year oh yeah like that's cheating genuinely cheating cheating the system cheating the scores everything. But i think when it's done in the way that it's been described there i feel like it's that doesn't sound as cheap like that just sounds like he maybe wasn't aware that this shot was a. Or you know they've just let each other off now and again but maybe they need to go i'll tell you what from you know we'll all play exactly by the rules moving forward little scenario for you then.
In uh 15 years time you've retired from youtube right yeah. And you won a golf course you own it you're the boss and it's called um rick shields towers rickshaws um the clubhouse i don't know it's called whatever it's called you're the boss right you're at this point you're in your 50s which i think of a golf course neighbor yeah. So i'm seeing i'm seeing 50 over this is rickshaws 50 years right okay in 50 years in 50 years time that'd be quite old then.
Your hair will be looking good i'd love my transparency yeah i did transplant you maybe like a nice beer belly from all the red wine you're drinking yeah you got aston martin you wear hugo boss jeans obviously. And i was like a polo really big fancy watch yeah your teeth are even better than they are now like unnecessarily white okay um what else can we have still married to the first wife you're on the third right now okay yeah well listen obviously you've just had another kid as well. So you're like 55 of the brand newborn ah okay i like it you're wise 20. yeah yeah. And you're like my wife doesn't listen to this podcast really talent outrageously tanned as well the same color as these wooden things behind i sound a bit like that linnica fella yes wayne lineker that's exactly what i'm thinking about yeah still unlike all the social media apps like tick tock whatever there is there. And a bit of a pest etc okay i feel like you'd like to be this fast i know yeah. But you're basically the owner of the golf club okay. And you know you go most days you're always on a saturday propping up the bar giving out ales people that you like et cetera smoke at the bar they get free drinks obviously obviously and because it's your golf club it's your rules so it's this particular day it says you're going with a nice sunny june day. And there's a big compound and you find that the guy that's won has actually cheated okay. So it's your rules what are you going to do to him how are you going to punish him he's proper cheated yeah people have been thinking about. For a while he shot a gross 82 off 15 and won by a couple of shots but there's been evidence not only people know about it they've actually filmed him on the golf course moving his bunker moving to the ball in the bunker dropping one out of his pocket actually on film as well so it's definitely him your club your rules this is that easy he goes to the punishment wall ah okay. So this is how it works. So once said she has been you know um guilty of cheating we've got evidence hardcore evidence uh it goes to the board which actually is only me yeah. So i just make the rules yeah he cheated okay um he then.
Is uh called upon to attend the punishment wall uh he doesn't it's mandatory as well he he has to come. And at the punishment well saturday afternoon everyone's had a few beers because ever what's really good about the rickshaws golf course is nobody drives there everyone gets picked up by ubers. And or get dropped up after so you can drink as much as possible as well tesla's only tesla ubers you get picked up you get dropped off everyone can drink this dirt cheap i'm not i'm not in it. For making a profit you've made your millions billions this is now just a little playground. For the for the for the the wannabes yeah the wayne lineker wannabes right is your wife called courtney by the way she might be. So in the punishment wall there's a couple of shackles it's a little bit 50 shades of grey this i'm not sure we're going to go with this one one two on the hands yeah two on the feet. And they've got to turn backwards okay okay um i mean this bit sounds a little bit weird they have to drop the trousers you know he's diff shaft yeah. So the bare bottom is visible okay. And what takes place then.
Is what we call the punishment um what can we call it the punishment punch okay okay there's a there's a golden two iron set aside. For the punishment wall like 18 yes okay a little bit short of shafted because you don't need you want you want the loft. But you don't need the distance or the power okay we got the text from the production team here what they're saying sounds like [Laughter] when we did the stupid games at andrews where we tried to rhyme people's surnames. And match just thought this sounds like a rick rick or deals like rick shields um two iron loft 17 degrees we're going to go with. But a seven nine length okay because you want the lowness you want the power. But you want the accuracy strike then.
We have some not proper golf balls like this is where i draw the line okay i don't want anyone to die yeah okay i just want to be punished okay. So you know there's like squishy balls that are like almost a bit more like a squash ball yeah texture like a squishy one. And you tear up and everybody every single member who wants to attend with all a few beers or everyone's been joking and laughing i mean big frank on the wall isn't particularly happy because he's just about to get the punishment to iron in the buttocks everyone then.
Has an opportunity to pound the two-iron squash ball straight at the back of big frank yeah. And everyone's going g g. And hopefully he gets a few uh balls in the bum he then.
And then.
I'm gonna do one of two things okay if he's taking it like a man [Applause] if he's owned up to it. And turns around pulls his pants up and goes all right fellas i'm just tuning at this point here now you got me fellas i cheated i shouldn't have done it i'm really sorry i won't do it again okay i will allow them to be a member of the golf club if they paid double fees next.
Year. And they also have to have head covers on their hands and say cheetah for one year yeah if at this point big frank still denies it cries hits the floor please pleads this is not fair yeah right i'm gonna sue you all this jazz then.
He will be asked if we escorted out the premises um reported as a cheater to the national government governing bodies. And also what we didn't talk about i actually own all the golf course in the surrounding area as well just little play pens that i have he doesn't get to play any single golf course in the area either perfect so if you've got a dear rick for next.
Week emails podcast at rookshields.com and it's the last one next.
Week for a chance to win a motorcade and second place is a bag exactly. So last next.
Week no cheating i don't know how they would cheat. But no cheating to try. And win the prizes no cheating yeah next.
Week is the last one in the series of the mostly sponsored ones. So it's the episode we're going to give the last derrick we're going to do that live obviously. And then.
At the end of it we're going to pick out two names from the hat i just want to clear up all this was fictional too you've got a very strange. And vivid imagination with chains and balls and stuff like that but anyway.
